This Soft Food Diet Is Killing Me

Joined
Jan 25, 2017
Messages
1
I'm not even exaggerating. Let me explain.

I'm 5'9 and before I got this procedure done I was 112 pounds. Not by choice. I have various stomach disorders that make gaining weight insanely hard. I don't have an eating disorder either so don't bring that up. I just have a lot of problems with my stomach so even getting my weight to 112 pounds was a struggle but I got there.

Then I go with the clear choice implant thing, just for the top of my mouth I didn't need it for the bottom. They tell me I need to be on a soft food diet for 90 days.

It's day 54. I can't do this any more. I'm obsessed with food. That's all I've been doing for an entire week every waking hour is obsessing over food that I can't have because I'm starving. Everything I eat at this point I have no enjoyment over. I am force feeding myself so I won't die and if you think I'm being dramatic I'm 104 pounds at this point. Yes I've lost 8 pounds on this crap diet. I have no energy, I can't concentrate. I'm in a permanent brain fog and overly fatigued.

I take vitamins but that doesn't seem to be helping much. Every last bit of food I eat I have to force down my throat because I find everything so disgusting that I don't want it. Even when I do have an appetite (which is hardly ever) there's no food that I can think of that I want to eat that I also can eat.

If I've lost 8 pounds in 54 days, in another 46 days I'm going to lose 8 more. This will drop me down to under 100 pounds and at my height that's not a good idea, in fact it's practically dangerous due to my heart condition.

I can't do this any more, this was the biggest mistake of my life. I'd quite frankly rather be in pain than nauseous most of the time and hungry the rest of the time knowing I can't eat anything. I've done every last soft food you can think of that I can also eat. I don't want anything any more other than real food.

Do I really have to do this for 46 more days because if I drop under 100 pounds at my height then it's going to be VERY Dangerous. Yet, everyone's suggestion is like "Drink more smoothies". Well it's not easy to do that when you are so sick of them you have to force swallow them.

How in the world do I do this for 46 more days without losing my sanity and possibly my life if I drop to 95 pounds or whatever? How do people do this crap diet for 90 days and not go completely insane?

There's only so much soup you can have before the idea of it makes you nauseous. Eating the same 4 varieties of food over and over and over have not only killed my digestive system but my mind as well. I can't fathom living like this for another 46 days. If I'm this bad mentally and physically now, how much worse will I be when it's all over? Is this even WORTH my time?
 

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